Wednesday, June 28, 2006

A Time to Every Purpose

Perspective. Sometimes one must step back and discern what's most important about a particular goal. That's what I ended up doing about plans for a community worship service as we recover from Her Horribleness.

What I really wanted to do was some kind of service right now! And then something on the anniversary date of the storm. The first would be a support as we deal with the free-floating anxiety that's hanging in the air while we await what is to happen this hurricane season. The second to be present for the very real issues which will be popping up big time around 9/24.

The reality is that we just plain can't pull together two huge worship services so close together, so we had to decide which was more important. September 24th wins hands down!

Anniversary dates bring out all sorts of feelings and one of the best things the faith community can do is provide a venue for healing and expressing the very real depths of pain and loss that Golden Trianglers will be experiencing. Everyone has anniversary dates (and not just the generally good ones of weddings and birthdays). I know I tend to become numb and wrapped in cotton emotionally around a couple of my own significant anniversary dates. Others have different reactions.

September 24 is going to be especially difficult for those who still aren't in restored homes, or those who lost loved ones as a result of the storm (even if the loss occurred later), or those who stayed during the storm and experienced first-hand its power, fury, and devastation. Even people who think they haven't been affected sharply by the storm will probably find themselves dealing with anxieties and concerns about then.

So ........... We're focusing on how best to help our community as the fateful date approaches. We've a theme - Shelter from the Storm: A Service for Healing and Wholeness. First task - Identify where to hold it. We're going to see if we can get Ford Park Arena. What an appropriate symbolic location! Once we get the place set, we'll be working to get as many in the faith community as possible involved.

Keep us in your prayers! We've a lot to accomplish and a relatively short time to do it. There is a rightness about this. I trust that God will bring this to fruition - a time to every purpose - to mourn, to share our fears and anxieties, to gather for comfort and support, to encourage each other, to celebrate how far we've come in one year and to acknowledge just how far we have yet to go, ... to worship together across all boundaries. Yep! I think we can do this!

Monday, June 26, 2006

Castles in the Clouds


I watch the lazy breezes
Building castles in the clouds.
Their turrets rise before me
With their flags a-snapping loud.

The drawbridge lowers slowly.
Mighty armies thunder forth.
Their banners rainbow-colored,
Waving high above the Earth.

The battle plan is ordered
By the captain on his steed.
With a sudden flash of lightning
Clashing legions will he lead.

As the battle rages onward
Mighty winds begin to blow.
I fear my cloud-wrought castles
Will soon fall and be brought low.

Then silence tames the chaos
And the armies slip away.
Lazy breezes dance among the clouds.
They won the game they played.

Saturday, June 24, 2006

Return from OZ

Part 1

For the past ten days (followed by one day dealing with a nasty computer virus ack! ack! ptooey!), I've been living in that earthly otherworld known as General Assembly. It was as though we'd walked through the door of a huge anechoic chamber and the only outside 'noise' was what we brought inside with us. In the silence, after a few minutes, we could hear our heartbeat. Friends, the PC(USA) has an arrhythmia.

As you know, most of us have some kind of arrhythmia. Some are harmful, some aren't. I'm not sure of the status of this one. Truth is, when I came back to the 'real' world, I experienced a major cognitive dissonance and am trying to sort through it. So this will probably be a real ramble, and if you aren't into Presbyterian politics, my feelings won't be hurt one bit if you decide to wander away about now.

Some of my disconnect may be the result of a combination of concurrent happenstances: our first biennial meeting (which means there was a huge amount of business to process, since we hadn't met for two years), implementation of a 'paperless' meeting (with an intranet computer system that wasn't functioning anywhere near reliably), and the presentation of the Peace, Unity, and Purity (PUP) report which has been five years in the making. This last one was the flashpoint of a controversy which has been brewing in the PC(USA) for years, and, while it is truly about many important and deep theological issues, was reduced in the minds of many to "shall the PC(USA) approve in any way, shape, or form the ordination of homosexuals?"

For some, the ordination of homosexuals is an abomination and the turning point of whether they and their congregation will stay within the denomination. They rattle their sabers and proclaim, "If you adopt this, we'll be forced to take our marbles and run elsewhere!" For others, the ordination of homosexuals is too long coming into being. They have been forced to remain second-class members of the denomination, welcomed as members, but without the privilege and responsibility of serving as ordained leaders in any capacity. They rattle their sabers and proclaim, "If you don't adopt this, we'll be forced to take our marbles and run elsewhere!" *sigh*

Actually, if one reads the portion of our Book of Order which is used to forbid the ordination of homosexuals (and singles who are sexually active and unrepentant spouse-abusers and alcoholics and ..... well, the list of things the Book of Confessions calls sin is a rather long one), as long as one is celibate (on the homosexuality thing), one may be ordained. I can't remember when this particular piece of the Book of Order was adopted, but it was sometime in the early 90's, so it's been around for a while.

The PUP report was developed through the work of dedicated Christians (who happen to be Presbyterians) of all theological stripes. It passed unanimously! Not a single person who worked on the task force was against the position taken by the report. They found a way to remain in community AND STILL HOLD SIGNIFICANT THEOLOGICAL DIFFERENCES!

The GA voted in favor of adopting the report 57% - 43%. Some of those in the 43% were commissioners who felt that, with the controversy bubbling around the report, we should either refer it to a later GA or send it back to the task force for more work. When the referral didn't pass, they voted disapproval. Others were deeply wounded and grieved by the acceptance of the report.

It was rumored that the original plan was to walk out of the Assembly if the PUP report was adopted. Don't know if it were true, but would not have been surprised if it had happened. God had to have been in the midst of this Assembly, because I heard that the walkout plans were changed due to the election of Joan Gray as Moderator - the more conservative members of the Assembly did not want to besmirch her tenure as Moderator, since her stated position is of being against the ordination of homosexuals.

Presbys believe that, when we gather to make decisions, we are to come together and listen to all perspectives, then through the guidance of the Holy Spirit, discern God's direction. What group of people ever listens perfectly? And who's to say that my position is actually the right one? (I had no vote, but fully believe that the 57% were hearing Christ's call to be inclusive.) That's why we seem so darned divisive and at each other's throats so much of the time. We allow for the diversity which brings us to keep plugging away at issues until we become certain 'the way be clear'. So, of course at our next GA, we'll be wrestling with this issue ... and the next ... and the next ... and the next ... (I kinda figure we won't get this one sorted out until after I'm long dead.)

So, now we wait and see what comes next. I'm figuring it won't be pretty, but hope that the Spirit which infused the Assembly gets carried over to the people in the pews.

I've a couple of other things which have been niggling at me; however, I have a Session meeting to moderate and must shift gears. Therefore, I'm going to post this part and deal with the other things when I get back. Later!

--------------------------

Part 2

On to the next thing I want to think about: we have now taken a huge step backward in our policy on late-term abortion. The language has shifted toward the punitive and condemnatory. A rather conservative presbytery sent an overture to GA that completely negates the caring and pastoral work of the 2002 and 2003 GAs on this issue. I'll admit I'm missing a piece of what was finally adopted because someone managed to amend it to include a chunk of the 2003 GAs work which was more pastoral in nature, and the only persons to have the full text of that in front of them were the commissioners. It's not yet been sculpted into LES (the abysmally insufficient computer program).

This is the piece which really hit me hard. Part of the argument given was along the lines of 'well, you've had at least six months to take care of it, so if you didn't do it by then, then tough luck, sister!' OK - they didn't use precisely that language, but that was the way it came across. There is no softening language for those who might be victims of rape, or incest, or who must deal with the tragically difficult decision to abort a child with extremely severe birth defects. There is no sense of understanding how such a decision might not be able to be made earlier in a pregnancy. Sure, some of the wording includes "surround with a community of care". The basic purpose of the policy is along the lines of 'no matter what, the church is to affirm that that baby should be delivered alive'.

I know. That last sentence seems to say that I want death for the child. That's not truly where I'm going. Adoption would be the best option, I can't deny that. But I'm also not the woman who is in that situation, and I don't know what particular hell any particular woman faced with that decision is going through. All I know is that I'd want my pastor to be there with me, supportive of the situation, giving me all of the options, and walking with me through that choice without a hint of condemnation in the midst of it.

I've a friend who has a son who is about 35 now, who functions at the level of about a 6-9 month old. When he was born, the doctors gave him about six months. His parents are full-time caregivers and love him deeply. Their biggest fear is that this son should outlive both of them and be placed in institutional care. My friend has said that if the technology had existed to let them know what they would be facing, they would have made the difficult decision to abort this beloved child.

Why would anyone want to add an additional layer of pain to an already difficult situation? How can we, as church, be so quick to assume that this is a throw-away decision? I just don't understand it. Why are there those who want to exhibit some level of control over women, and assume that women are not able to make the 'right' decisions without their help, ... and then insist that the church endorse their definition of 'right? And, why, oh why, did we buy it and follow without examining the entire package more carefully? (well, I kind of know why - this was up for decision very late on the last night of decision-making, and came at the end of three hard-hitting days of huge decisions. There is an incredible amount of material to process at one of these things - I've been a commissioner before - and toward the end it becomes a fog as to what is actually being discussed and voted on. So, I'm not completely faulting the commissioners, but more the methods used to get this through.)

This one will be exceedingly difficult to recover from. I went back to my room that night and cried. This is one decision which I truly don't understand. Maybe it was a back-handed sop to the conservatives whose feelings were so hurt by the vote on the PUP report. I just don't know. Can you tell that I am wounded by this? What is it about sexuality and issues related to birth that seem to tie us so completely up in knots? Perhaps I'm just being dense. If so, would somebody enlighten me?

--------------------------

Part 3

This is the last one, I promise.

It's hard to calculate how much time was spent on items related to the previous two posts, and other items of a similar nature. We've argued and nattered about feminine language for the Holy Trinity, where to store our historical documents and artifacts, whether or not to have non-geographic synods and presbyteries, who owns church property, where will we fund this and that project/proposal/idea, and other topics big and small.

I wonder what Jesus would have to say about us. True, we glancingly addressed some social justice issues, even spent time delving into the social witness of investment of the church's finances. There are some wonderful documents researched, prepared, and presented on things like usury, the imbalance of wealth, HIV/AIDS, peacemaking, living wages for migrant farm workers (specifically the Immokolees - we participated in a boycott of Taco Bell for about 3 years and, finally, growers have agreed to raise the price they pay their workers to something approaching a liveable wage), mining, and renewable resources. There were others, I just didn't spend time to go and dig their names up.

I truly don't want to give the impression that nothing good came from GA. That would be inaccurate. However, the things we gave the most weight to were probably NOT the things Jesus would have had us focus on. As I read scripture, Jesus would have been far more pissed about the way we treat each other than over whether we included an outsider in the inner circle. *sigh*

I think it would be an incredible experience to sit down at a GA and truly focus on a plan to address, say, poverty for five days (the amount of time spent in committee and then plenary). Just think of the good which could be accomplished if our 2.3 million member denomination decided to forgo the arguments over what kind of sinner could be ordained (we're all sinners after all) and narrowed in on ways to address the subsets which contribute to povery and commit to helping those living in poverty to overcome the obstacles they face. If you think about it, we Presbys are not a bunch of slackers when it comes to the income department. We've a fairly hefty percentage of our members who are not living anywhere near the poverty level.

Or what if we committed our human and financial resources to peacemaking? Do you think that 2.3 million Christians living out Jesus' call to "turn the other cheek", in whatever form would be best suited to a particular place and time, might have some significant impact in our increasingly violent and separatist world? What if God is calling us to be role-models on how to live according to Jesus' prayer that we might be one, as he and God are one (different in many ways, but together in unity). Whoa! Tough task! But, oh! how I pray that we might be able to accomplish it!

Somehow, with our position papers and policies, we miss out on the actual living out of our faith. I think that was the thing I came away with from this GA. We've got the i-dotting and t-crossing down pat. But Jesus wasn't an i-dotter or t-crosser! He told the rich young ruler (depending on translation) to sell all he had and give it to those who had not. He told his disciples (and I mean all of his followers by this term) that they had to give up their life to gain it, which at least partially means putting aside one's pride and plans to follow Jesus' plans as discerned through the work of the Holy Spirit. I don't think Jesus meant for us to spend all of our time writing position papers! It's the doing that was high on his agenda!

Now all I've gotta do is figure out what doing I'm called to be about. Oh! I'm not totally ignorant about that, and am going about it as best I am able. Guess I'm just a bit tired right now, and being impatient about the whole thing. I'd truly like it laid out in front of me step by step, so I can see the final destination RIGHT NOW! Blast it all! Sometimes I wish this faith business didn't depend so much on faith! *chuckle* In the grand scheme of things, I really do trust it will all work out, even the knotty spots. Just give me some time to take it all in and I'll be back to my positive (mostly) self again!

Saturday, June 17, 2006

Happy Dance!!

WHEW! Mission accomplished, almost! And this saga has taken some very interesting twists and turns.

Here's the deal: As Moderator of the General Assembly Committee on Representation, I had to give this big deal report on the work of our committee, along with a team of three others. We've been working on this report for about a year, built on the parameters we were given at the outset. If you've been reading, it wasn't too long ago that they threw a seven-minute overview at us. Sooooooo....after some agonizing, I crafted a 5 minute piece on the work of our committee.

Get to the General Assembly, arrive at the committee meeting where our report will be presented, primed and ready for my 5-minute overview, to discover that the committee has changed the ground rules - no one who is not a member of the committee may speak for more than 3 minutes! Now, you could have more than one person present the overview, but neither could speak for more than 3 minutes. ARGH!! Quick thinking on my part, and the fact that I tend to work from manuscript anyway, led us to splitting the overview in half and one member of the group gave the first part, while I presented the second part. (Good thing I use BIG print!)

We survived round one.

The main committee splits into subcommittees, then we were to give our big report. Remember, we've been working on this thing for about a year. We get to the subcommittee and the moderator decides they aren't going to hear our report, and maybe we can present snippets, but not until they've looked at the outside statistical review of our committee's work.

These are open meetings, so, after a few panicked moments of trying to figure out how to salvage things, I went back inside and began listening to their discussion. It didn't take too long before the moderator relented and let us give our powerpoint presentation. Each of us chopped pieces here and there as we went along and managed to pare the 30 minute presentation down to about 20. That helped the committee and then we got asked a question: What resources would be helpful for your committee to fulfill it's work?

Based on the format we had been told to work from, we'd never dreamed we'd be asked this Christmas in June question, so, of course, we didn't have an answer! Blessings upon the moderator, though, for she had the presence of mind to suggest that we might want to think about it before responding. With permission to come back the next morning, we left to do some dreaming (literally! I asked the committee members present to sleep on it!).

This morning, we gathered in the lobby to do some brainstorming. After about an hour, inspiration struck: What if we got the General Assembly to declare 2007-2008 The Years of Diversity and asked for the resources to make it a whiz-bang affair?! Trekked back to the committee and they thought it was a cool idea, too, and included it in their recommendations. Such an idea has financial implications, so when the subcommittees got back together to develop their final report, the financial implications were a part of the discussion. Since many of the members of the committee did not feel that they could vote for additional expenditures in a time of tightened budgets in good conscience (and I truly couldn't fault them on this perspective at all), the recommendation was more or less decimated.

Truth is, we knew what we were asking was a wild hare longshot, especially as there would be money involved. Something our committee has wrestled with since I first became a member was the issue of visibility. The idea was out there, so how could we make at least a part of it happen? Especially since this would be the perfect GA to endorse the concept, seeing as we're meeting in Birmingham, Alabama, where the Sixteenth Street Baptist Church (one of the Civil Rights Movement National Register of Historic Places) is located.

Once the review committee had approved their report, they let our committee look it over and make comments. As we left the room to make our suggestions, the GA resource person to the committee was returning to the room, so we asked what the financial implications would be if the GA simply declared The Years of Diversity without the additional resources. Learning there would be no financial implications, we ran with it.

The review committee had recommended that our committee "be encouraged to develop a year-long churchwide emphasis to celebrate the diversity of our Church in Synods and Presbyteries". So we asked that the review committee add the following: and that the General Assembly designate 2008 as A Celebration of the Year of Diversity in support of this emphasis.

TADA!! They were so happy at being able to do that that it passed unanimously!!! Mission (mostly) accomplished!! We got our visibility (which was really our goal for this particular situation, afterall)!!

Surely God was in the midst of all this!!

WOOHOO!! HAPPY DANCE!!!!! WOOHOO!! ALLELUIA!!

So ... Now it goes to the floor of the General Assembly. I'm not sure when the report will be voted on by the whole Assembly, but do you really think they'll say "no" to diversity in Birmingham?

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Weeeeeeeeee're Off ........

to see the wizard! Well, not really.

General Assembly starts on Thursday and I have a pre-Assembly meeting or two to attend, so I'm headed out of here this evening!

Am I ready? Of course not! I'm further along than usual, though. I actually have my suitcase mostly packed. Laura, pick your jaw up off the floor! *chuckle* (Generally at this point on the day I'm leaving, I'm still wandering around the house asking myself "What should I take? What should I take?")

Don't know how much time I'll have for this, but when I get a chance I'll post. There ought to be some interesting happenings this week and, if the brain's functioning when I get back to the room, I'll try to write something coherent about it.


Catch ya later! Must locate shoes!

Monday, June 12, 2006

St. Pixels

Back in 2004, the Methodist Church in England decided to try something new - a virtual 3D church. Out of curiosity, I wandered through the church, visited and prayed with its members, checked out the architecture and furnishings (with a pipe organ no less!), wandered in the Crypt, watched people get 'smited' by the wardens (with justification - I didn't see any smitings out of hand) and, oddly enough, found an interesting community with a place for respite for this pastor. Things got busy, though, and I wandered away and forgot about the Church of Fools.

It was quite an experiment and unfortunately wasn't able to survive as a stand-alone. Oh, the 'building' still exists and you can go in to visit as an individual, but it's not the same.

Church of Fools also had a bulletin board section where there were discussions, games (Rosencrantz? Mornington Crescent? other weird stuff), mutual support, a chat cafe, and so on. I had left my joining email in my inbox and just happened to notice it the other day, so I decided to visit. What the hey!

Guess what. The Methodists are going to try it again, but they have to build it from the ground up, so it'll be a while before the virtual 3D church is up and running again. St. Pixels is starting things out with a revamped bulletin board and the chat cafe, with a daily worship service in the cafe. (I haven't quite figured out what time it starts, since the time is a combination of military time and GMT, I think. *sigh*) I've 'transfered my membership' *chuckle* and am now a bona fide member of the community again.

What was really cool is that there are people who remember me from the old site, and I remember them. It's been at least a year since I visited, so that seems absolutely amazing to me.

With the start of the hurricane season, they've started a thread about hurricanes for people to post their concerns, what they're dealing with in the aftermath of last year's hurricanes, to support those affected by hurricanes. It's not gotten much of a start yet, but I suspect it will grow as the season goes by. Might be a good way for those of us still hobbled in recovery to meet and share stories and help each other.

Well, off to go a-visiting! See ya later!

Friday, June 09, 2006

Of Birth, Death, ... and Life

Today is the anniversary of my birth. It's not a grand day, in the scheme of things, and over the years, I've often even forgotten it. Generally, if anything is done in acknowledgement of the achievement of another year, it's been something I've chosen to do for myself to celebrate. Not so here. Each year, a number of members and staff have gathered for lunch and hilarity. This year was no exception. It was all I could do to get my "inappropriate" birthday card back from one of my older members! She kept fanning herself with it, and I kept telling her that the hot guy on the front was the reason she kept feeling hot! *hoots of laughter!* I haven't laughed quite that hard in ages!

And yet, there's a weird cast over the day. I opened my paper to the picture of a dead Al-Zarqawi on the front. While I feel some relief at the end of this particular individual's reign of terror, I can't help but fear that we now have to deal with a martyr who will live on through the evil and terror of those who take up his mantle. It is a mystery to me that anyone could believe that God's will is the slaughter of anyone who does not hold to a particular set of beliefs. My own thoughts are that Zarqawi isn't enjoying all those virgins he seemed to believe would come his way upon his martyrdom. Yet his death is splashed across the pages of papers and news reports - a visible, truly evilness brought to a personal end.

Then there's the family I'm doing the memorial for tomorrow, basically invisible people. The wife has been a member of my congregation for years, but no one really knows her. I met her once and she seemed a nice lady, sad and accepting what was soon to happen (looking forward to it, perhaps?). I didn't know much about her then, and speaking was difficult for her, so she did not pass along much more. I feel guilt and sorrow that I don't have much to share. I realize that often I've had to do memorials for people I'd never even met, yet this one touches me deeply for some reason. I hope that I am able to do honor to the family and help in the healing of their loss. I trust that God will give me the words which help. That's all I can do.

And, then there's life. My brother sent me a HAPPY BIRTHDAY! email. He's currently back in active duty in Kosovo. Part of his email said this:

I am safely back in Kosovo watching the peace break out around here. Other than some shootings and rock throwings and yelling at each other, it has been pretty quiet. It has been raining and cool almost every day since I have been back. Fortunately, most of the bad guys are fair weather rock chuckers so when it rains, it is quiet. Not much else to report from over here. Just alot of meetings and briefings and all the other wonderful things that represent bureaucracy and staff work.

"Watching the peace break out" - what a wonderful concept! That was a word I needed to hear today. Would that humanity could get their act together enough to 'watch the peace break out' everywhere! Then we could get about the business of living our lives without watching over our shoulders for the next person who feels that the only way forward is through hateful death and destruction. Oh, that we could find ways to convince them they are wrong before anyone else is harmed! *sigh*

One of my birthday cards said "Here's hoping all your birthday wishes come true .... even the embarassing ones!" My biggest birthday wish isn't the least bit embarassing - that the peace may break out everywhere and that all our family members may return safely home.

Thursday, June 08, 2006

With Fear and Trembling

I really regret opening my mail yesterday. In it was the terrifying news that I have to come up with a seven minute presentation for the General Assembly Review committee which will be grilling my team Friday week.

Seven minutes?! ARGH!!! Mind you, I do a sermon most Sundays and they tend to run about 10 minutes (if I'm lucky, less if not). So why does this thing terrify me? The notice came with dire warnings that the Moderator would cut anyone off at the knees if they went over 7 minutes. Actually, I don't think the length is the problem. (Besides, there is something Biblical about the number 7, as in completion.)

It's the context. This is definitely an "outside the comfort zone" experience. I keep wondering how I ended up in this situation. *chuckle* I certainly never imagined myself moderating a General Assembly-level committee in my lifetime, nor did I ever imagine myself having any visible role ANYWHERE, to tell the truth. My personal preference is wallflower-mode, except when I feel somehow compelled beyond myself to be otherwise (if that makes any sense at all).

It's a good thing I don't chew my fingernails, or I wouldn't have any fingers left now!

*sigh* So it is with fear and trembling that I now begin the crafting of seven minutes of something which I hope doesn't come out as drivel. Help me, O God, for I selfishly don't want to look like a dolt!

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

The Number of the Beast

All right - I acknowledge that many of these have been around for years, but I just couldn't see letting today slip past without acknowledging the "Number of the Beast" - 666. Did you know any of these little known factoids? (scrounged from EcuLaugh and a website I copied a long time ago, but have apparently lost the front page information to)

$665.95 Retail price of the Beast
$699.25 Price of the Beast plus 5% sales tax
$769.95 Price of the beast with accessories and replacement parts
$656.66 Walmart price of the Beast
$646.66 Next week's Walmart price of the Beast
$6.66 Beast steak, per pound
1-866-666-6666 Toll free number of the Besat
6-6-6 Fertilizer of the Beast
6-666-66666-6 ISBN of the Beast
66-66-66 bust, waist and hips of the Beast
665.99996973 Intel Pentium number of the Beast
00666 Zip code of the Beast
1-666 Area code of the Beast
660 Approximate number of the Beast
DCLXVI Roman numeral of the Beast
666.0000 Number of the High Precision BEast
0.666 Number of the Millibeast
/666 Beast Common Denominator
666^(-1) Imaginary number of the Beast
1010011010 Binary of the Beast
Phillips 666 Gasoline of the Beast
$6.66 9/10 Price of a Beast gasoline
Route 666 Way of the Beast
666F Oven temperature for roast Beast
666k Retirement plan of the Beast
6.66% 5 year CD rate at First Beast National Bank, $666 minimum deposit
i66686 CPU of the Beast
666i BMW of the Beast
DSM-666 Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the Beast
668 Next-door neighbor of the Beast
666 mg Recommended Minimum Daily Requirement of Beast
Lotus 6-6-6 Spreadsheet of the Beast
Word 6.66 Word Processor of the Beast
6 h 66 min Beast Standard Time (BST)
Beverly Hills 66666 Beast's favorite TV show
6/6/66 Birthdate of the Beast
666-66-6666 Social Security number of the Beast
6666 PIN of the Beast
25.806975 Square root of the Beast
Motel 666 Beast Western
Windows 96 ver. 666 OS of the Beast
333 Half brother of the Beast
555 Number of the Wanna-Beast

Monday, June 05, 2006

Not Holding My Breath

The hoopla's begun! Apocalyptic crackpots are crawling out of the woodwork in anticipation of the END OF THE WORLD (they do tend to talk in capitals), and the SECOND COMING. Tomorrow is the day which has the 'number of the beast' marked on it; although, I haven't quite figured out how they manage to deal with that silly little zero just before the last six. If you're going to ignore the next to the last number of the date, then the day when the world's going to end pops up much more frequently (ie. 6/6/96 would become 6/6/6, wouldn't it?).

Some day last week I saw a huge ad in the Houston Chronicle with pretty small print predicting all manner of horribleness happening before the end of June. Something to do with preachers lying to their members and falsely interpreting texts and some other mangled hermeneutics that I couldn't read because the grammar was atrocious and the print was so small.

It just tickles my funny bone when someone goes off and predicts a precise date for the End Time. That day is one that'll sneak up on us when we aren't looking, even Jesus tells us he doesn't know the date!

A minister friend of mine tells of the time he and a few friends sat down and scoured the scriptures to figure out the exact date when Jesus would return. They pondered the symbolic significance of all the images in the Revelation, looked at Old Testament clues, researched and argued all the details until they were absolutely certain of their calculations. The date just had to be October 22nd, 1976. The problem was - It was 1978.

So ....... I'm not holding my breath. Let the zaniness begin!!

An absurd PS - Since there are 24 time zones, does the Apocalypse start in one place on 6/6/6 and then move forward hour by hour?

Saturday, June 03, 2006

Of Babel and Pentecost

Tomorrow we celebrate Pentecost Sunday, the founding of the church universal through the sending of the Holy Spirit. My sermon's headed a different direction because I'm using the Old Testament text instead of the New; however, I had some thoughts come together this morning and didn't want to lose them.

OK - so I'm a procrastinator and waited until the last minute to try to pull together something audio on the speaking of multiple languages on that first Pentecost Sunday. So my computer skills leave something to be desired (and perhaps my equipment, as well, but we'll never know because I don't have the skills to figure it out! *chuckle*). I am reasonably good at tracking down what I'm looking for on the net, however. Therefore, I've spent several hours last night and this morning trying to track down wav files to download and cobble together into a audio-collage of languages speaking the Lord's Prayer. HA! Well, I can find them, but the ones I want are either not downloadable or too expensive for a 15 second burst on one Sunday morning.

Then it struck me - why doesn't there exist a Pentecost rendering of the Lord's Prayer? Why are we afraid to consider the possibility that Christ speaks to us in a multitude of languages?

On that first Pentecost, the dumbfounded disciples spilled from that upper room and wandered into the streets speaking languages they knew they didn't know, and the crowds were equally dumbfounded. That annually-mangled list of names in Acts was probably just a smattering of the languages spoken on that day.

If you wander back into Genesis for a bit, you run across the story of the building of the Tower of Babel. Humanity decided to build for the skies. While I have a bit of a theological problem with God desiring divisiveness and confusion, the tale is as good a story as any for the reason there are so many languages floating around. Anywyay, the communication situation now is problemmatic, because Jane's family can't understand Joe's family, who are really perplexed by the words coming out of the mouths of John's family, and so on.

We're off and running, and language continues to tangle us up until this very day (and probably long into the future!). Even when we're speaking English, there's British English, Australian English, Deep South English, California English, New England English, ..... well, you get the picture.

Then along comes Pentecost. I guess it's only been about five years ago or so that I began to realize the importance of Pentecost, a special day of the church we Protestants seem to downplay. I initially reveled in the day because it's one of the few Sundays in the church year when one can wear red! I love green (it's my favorite color), but let's get real! Out of 52 weeks, there are 11 weeks of white, 10 weeks of purple, and 1 (count them! ONE!) week of red. So I cheat. I carry Pentecost over a few weeks instead of dragging around in ubiquitous green all summer.

However, I digress.

Pentecost is more than an excuse to wear red for a while. It's a birthday celebration! And the nature of that birthday goes back to that tower of Babel story. When the disciples received the Holy Spirit, and the visitors from other countries heard the Good News in their own languages and believed, God didn't erase the translation difficulties in perpetuity. Instead of wiping the slate clean and allowing all who believe to speak the exact same language, God transcends the language barrier.

It seems to me that God revels in the majesty and possibility of diversity. Sure, we humans haven't gotten the hang of that possibility. I've been wandering through some religious discussions online and continue to be amazed at the number of people who want everyone to walk in lockstep with their understanding of the faith. If God had wanted that to happen, it could have easily been contrived at any point throughout history. Yet God calls us to decide for ourselves, gives us the free will to accept or reject or to just plain mull over for however long we need, and to seek out our own pathways in life.

For me, that has become the celebration in Pentecost: God is able to accomplish so much in spite of our babble and confusion. And among the followers of Jesus were now: Parthians, Medes, Elamites, and residents of Mesopotamia, ... French, Russians, Koreans, Choctaws, Cherokees, Mexicans, Vietnamese, Germans, South Africans, Maoris, Malawis, Egyptians, Palestinians, Deep Southerners, New Englanders, African Americans, ... old, young, middle-aged, the disabled, male and female (regardless of sexual orientation), red state conservatives, blue state liberals, ... and the list continues to grow, for I believe God deeply loves all of creation, and I refuse to put God in that proverbial box to limit who will be accepted into the glory of God's love.

Friday, June 02, 2006

Can Anything Good Come From Nazareth?

Hmmmmmm.... I just reread yesterday's post and realized that it took a different direction from my original intent. Nothing wrong with that. I stand by what I posted, but I don't want to lose yesterday's intent either: that, occasionally, even something I'm diametrically opposed to can present something of positive value.

As you might have guessed, I'm no fan of The Layman. I wander through its pages more as an exercise in trying to understand those I disagree with so vehemently. I generally have to be in the right frame of mind to undertake this task so I don't blow a gasket or something. Yesterday was one of those days where a teaser caught my eye and I just couldn't put it down. (Not a good start to perusing the rag.)

While looking for the actual article (which I never found, btw), I came across a box which listed our last ten General Assembly moderators and the Layman's assessment of their theological/political stance on a variety of their pet peeves. I'm quite sure the Layman didn't mean it this way, but it was a sign of hope for me.

Of those last ten moderators, six have been vocal in their stance in favor of the ordination of homosexuals, three were sort of middle of the road, and one was reviled because he didn't jump through the Layman's hoops (in the guise of a special called meeting of the Assembly during the year over some trivial issue which wasn't decided in their favor at the original meeting). This is good news!!

Please understand. At the time each moderator was elected, there were candidates for the office who staunchly support the views of the Layman. At the time each moderator was elected, the vote on the final ballot (usually there were 2-3 ballots) in favor of the winning candidate was by at least two-thirds of the voting commissioners. This tells me that the vocal minority is mostly that - vocal - when it comes to the mainstream of this old mainline denomination.

So - something good did come out of something which is usually filled with misinformation and hate. Doesn't mean I'm planning to read each issue when it arrives (pastors get the darned thing for free, so there's no escaping its arrival); however, I have been reminded that sometimes serendipity sneaks in and I probably ought to keep my eyes open for it!

Thursday, June 01, 2006

Lowering the Blood Pressure

I oughta know better! Reading "The Layman" is not a good thing for my blood pressure. For anyone who doesn't know, the Layman is the ultra-super-duper conservative newspaper of the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.). I have been a personal victim of a major misquote, so I know that if you don't happen to swim in their pond, there's a fairly slim chance that anything one says or does will even remotely resemble the actual event.

Our denomination is quickly approaching our now biennial General Assembly, the meeting where decisions affecting the national church are made. Lurking on the horizon is a decision to approve or disapprove the report of a Task Force which has been working for about six years on issues related to ordination standards, our understanding of Christology, and a couple of other issues I can't remember off the top of my head.

The membership of this task force is comprised of a wide range of theological viewpoints, and a diverse background (culturally, geographically, age, you name it!). Much prayer, tears, time, discussions (both heated and otherwise), Bible study, information gathering, historical perspective, relationship-building, ... well, just plain love and effort ... has gone into their final report.

For those on either of the ends of the theological spectrum, there are things which won't make them happy. (Sounds like a good compromise to me!) What impressed me about the report is that those who were involved in the work agreed unanimously to the outcome. They each have said that their essential understanding of their faith has not waivered, and their basic stance on some of the issues is still the same; however, they have come to respect each others' positions and have found a way to work together for the good of the church. HOORAH!!

So, that's the background. Here's my beef. If these individuals were able to listen for the working of the Spirit in the completion of their charge and then present what they understood the Spirit to be speaking through them, then why can't those at the theological extremes consider the possibility that God is doing something new here? Why must the language immediately become "my way or the highway"? Already, groups are gathering names, overtures, congregations and threatening that, if the vote goes such-and-such a way, they're picking up their marbles and leaving.

It appears that minds are already closed, which seems to me to be a denial of what it means to live out one's Christianity. I don't believe that God stopped acting and informing our faith at the point of establishing what books would be our holy text. If God had stopped then, why do we continue to translate texts into language which, we hope, makes sense to hearers today? Why do we not follow point by point what's written in Leviticus (the usual text brought into play around the ordination of homosexuals)? Are we to turn a blind eye to advances in understanding our world and our humanity? I don't think so!

It saddens me to think of schism, yet it appears that schism may be precisely what is ahead. However, I've been involved in that wonderful experience known as General Assembly Commissioner. No matter what those not directly involved the process might say, that group of people elected to make these big decisions for our denomination are touched and led by the Holy Spirit. That is what we believe - in our gathering and discussion, we are called to listen for the guidance of the Spirit, and if we are true to that guidance, our faith and denomination will be strengthened. I sure hate the conflict in the meantime, though!